my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Randomize
