The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
