We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Randomize
