are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Pants are for mortals
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
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