that's an acceptable place to lick
our cab driver is having phone sex.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Dicks are not precious.
Randomize
