so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
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