Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
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