What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
