glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
