school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
So much Jack, so little girl.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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