How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Randomize
