Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
