What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
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