I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
