I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
This house was built for laser tag.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize