I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
i used baking grease as lip gloss
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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