Rock
Scissors
Fuck
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
