it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Randomize
