Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize