Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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