How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
