if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
