every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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