Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
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