Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
