Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
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