Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
