No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Randomize
