yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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