Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
