Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
