why didn't you poke me back
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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