how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
Randomize
