I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
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