He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
