We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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