I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize
