Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Randomize
