I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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