I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
