So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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