So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
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