im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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