Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Randomize
