I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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