Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
