Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
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