I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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