The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Randomize
