And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
