After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
It was like getting head from an anaconda
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
